To you ♥

It's Day 9 from not seeing you. Okay, maybe I saw you on Tues. But then again, that doesn't seem to help much. Hahas. For me now, I guess, the only thing is to not even see you. That way, it can help me to forget you so much faster. Hearing so many things recently, and it just led me wonder so many things. That girl. That girl that you like. Do you still like her? Or do you already have someone else in mind? Someone, that I know, would never be me. It's always the same storyline for each drama. I like you. You like her. She like him. And the line carries on. Finding someone who you like and likes you back, it's just so impossible. So, I really hope those couples around us would last ;)
I really do wonder, how do you look at me. You know, it's kindda funny. I've known you for almost 3 years and yet, the first time that I ever held a true conversation with you was just last year, in August. I can never forget back then. August. Nearing National Day. Bicultural trip campfire. You were the IC of that event. I still remembered, that it was just kindda awkward with you. But things got better. We talked a little, and I mean it, it's just like 2 sentences? And then, all of a sudden, we started playing badminton. Hahas, I can never forget that. How can you ever not let me win? :( Hmm... Then we had the campfire. Instead of joining with your friends, you stayed at the mixer, being the responsible IC you should be, hahas. You didn't have dinner that night, and instead let us had dinner. And I can never forget how you would ask us to go back home first cos' it was around 10 plus, and we were girls. So you told us to leave first while you stayed to pack up with your friends. That day was the first time I officially knew you.
And ever since then, when you became the ACT of CCA, we had more activities together. I don't know if it's fate or what. But I'm glad that with every CCA session, whenever we split up into groups, you would just so happen to take on my group. Hahas. You, being you, would always crack jokes and simply bring laughter to the entire group. You don't really 摆架子 and well, it's just really comfortable to be around you. Maybe, that's just your personality. But that personality of yours, made me feel damn comfortable and well... It gives me a sense of security~ When ridiculous rumours were created, you didn't find it awkward with me, instead, you would even joke back. "再讲, 我打你啊!" Hahahas, come to think of it, it's really funny xD Not only that, you would even offer help for our studies, and well, I should have taken up that offer!
For just that short period of 3 months. You brought nothing but happiness for me. For just that short period of 3 months. You made me look forward to CCA every week. For just that short period of 3 months. You made me fall for you. So hard and so fast. You know, I never really expected myself to like anyone for the rest of my secondary school life. Cos' mainly I felt bad towards him. And well, it just doesn't seem right for me to like anyone else. But... Since August, since then, spending so much time with you, I just can't help it. I didn't really like you from the start. I always thought that it was just another infatuation and it will pass off soon. At least, that's what I thought in December. When you had already left early from the CCA outing. But then, when January came.
CCA Orientation. I can never forget that day. I realised. It wasn't just another infatuation that will pass off quickly. I've never felt so affected by a guy before. When you were awkward with me, for god knows what reason, I felt... Empty? Hurt? I don't know how to describe that feeling. It was like... I became so damn upset for the rest of the day. Maybe, it was due to me falling sick on that day, and I felt sort of pekcek. But then, I would never be so affected just because a guy is awkward with me. If it was others, I would have thought, "He's the one that's awkward, not me, not my problem." But it just isn't for you. It was only then. I realised.
To you, maybe you wouldn't even have a single memory of all these. But these are what I went through throughout the year. Whenever I see you, I get happy. Whenever I don't get to see you, I grumble. You really have no idea how happy I was when I talked to you. I guess, it was around March. I didn't know what happened. All I know was you started talking to me. And it wasn't just those short conversations, like during campfire, it was alot more. Like normal trainings. I was so happy, that I immediately went mad, when you were out of sight.
I guess, it's not just purely an infatuation now. It might really be like. Hahas. But, you've already graduated. And it's close to 0% for me to see you now. Since you didn't really like to come back to school, it's just impossible to see you. For now, for me to see you, it's just purely luck. Really luck. That day. Tuesday. I can never forget. You made me happy, maybe to the extent of forgetting my A-Maths results, for that few minutes. Seeing you just makes my day. I didn't expect you to be in school. When someone told me that she saw you in the canteen, I was trying to figure out where could you be. Until History lesson, when we had to go to the library. There, I saw you in your class tee. Have I ever mentioned that you simply look great in your class tee? Hahas. But I had to leave :( After getting back History test paper, I was really down. Really, really, really down. I wasn't performing up to expectations. That I know. But then, I saw you. And well, it just shook everything off my mind. I was really happy, elated, excited etc. I had no idea how to express that happiness. It was like... I didn't expect you to come out just at that moment and you did. You even stayed there for quite long.
Hahas. I'm sure that this might last for quite some time. Maybe even till next year. Just typing this to let me rewind back to those times when I felt very happy. When I felt so comfortable. When I felt the most sense of security. You're graduating, or should I say, you have already graduated. Things aren't going to change. For that. I just hope that you would have faith in yourself. Heard that you don't have much faith in yourself for your Os. Don't ever doubt yourself. Must believe in yourself. Must believe that you are able to do it. And when you have that belief, you would be able to score! I know it doesn't matter much to you if I'm here to support you. But well, just letting you know, I would be here to support you. No matter if you know it or not.
Have faith in yourself. Don't doubt yourself. I know you can do it! Jiayous for your O' levels! ^^